One of my favorite people is Ariana Huffington. She is an incredibly successful business woman across many industries. While starting the Huffington Post, Ariana passed out from exhaustion, hitting her head on the corner of her desk. Doctors failed to find a medical cause; the only reason remaining was not physical. The fall resulted from mental, psychological, and physical fatigue from working around the clock.
Later, Ariana participated in an interview with Oprah on Super Soul Conversations. She began to describe her illumination to the importance of psychological health in life. She shared a statement that struck deep inside me, a belief I knew was powerful yet struggled to fully accept: “Live life as if it is rigged in your favor.” The statement resonated in me deeply for I know I often approach life from a fearful place, feeling that I need to prove myself. This mentality manifests itself in my confidence, competence, and how I engage in conversations. I live expecting others to point out my mistakes and criticize me. This thinking results in believing the world is against me, causing me to withdraw in an attempt to prevent being hurt. The true result of this fear is my disengagement from a life that brings joy, creativity, and excitement. It keeps me from stepping out and taking risks in my personal life and also business.
“Live life as if it’s rigged in your favor.” This concept contradicts the unconscious western mentality where people are colluding to watch us fail. In this attempt to protect myself from this imaginary enemy, I prevent myself from engaging with people, events, ideas, and more. Ariana’s statement presents a new option, a path full of hope. What if I lived as if the world was for me not against me? How would this change my life? The short answer: drastically!
After letting this statement sink in, I allowed it to change my interactions with others in my business. I met strangers assuming they wanted a kind interaction. I entered a presentation believing the audience wanted me to succeed. I shared joys and challenges with colleagues believing they cared about me. I brought my best self to work believing people valued my knowledge, experience, and opinion. I showed up to my life certain it will be wonderful. To my surprise, the majority of time my expectations are overwhelmingly met!
A client internalized this mentality recently. The past was laden with bad experienced, broken relationships, and relational trouble in the office. Remembering these struggles led to him enter interactions worrying if he had hurt them in the past, how they viewed him, and if he’d make a mistake. The result was coming across withdrawn, half hearted, and uninterested. Once he chose to see every interaction as new, believing people enjoyed his interactions, he came to every conversation different. He exuded presence, care, humor, and interest, for that’s what he felt! Believing others want you to succeed means we come to any situation with our best self.
The physical exhaustion plaguing our culture rests upon the belief that “I need to be perfect to be accepted.” I don’t know about you, but I can’t relate to a perfect person. I don’t know what it’s like. What I resonate with is wanting others to succeed, to see the best in people, and that everyone deserves my support. When I assume everyone wants me to succeed, as I do for them, I engage life! This mindset keeps me from becoming burnt out because I’m no longer living to prove my worth to others, but believing they see my value and want to celebrate it with me.
How would believing life is rigged in your favor change how you engage the world? I don’t know the answer to that question for it rests in you. What I do know is believing this simple concept has changed my life and I believe it has the power to change yours. Take a conscious step into a happier life, living life as if it’s rigged in your favor!